I Wish I Didn’t Know
The Burden of Knowing is Growing
I recently read a sad, yet powerful article in which the author explains how he fell into a state of disrepair when he realized that the years of work he put into restoring his land after it was destroyed by a wildfire, were all in vain. It dawns on him that all of the time he spent focusing on this project instead of his family and friends, or literally anything else, was wasted, because climate change and invasive species are making it physically impossible for his land to return to what it once was. When all of this comes crashing down he says, “And at the crescendo of sobbing and loss, the saddest thought I’ve ever had came to me: I wish I didn’t know.”
“I wish I didn’t know.”
It’s the classic “ignorance is bliss” wrapped in more authentic syllables.
But why do we say it?
There’s likely an infinite number of reasons why, but to put it plainly, life would just seem easier if we didn’t know about its down sides. Whether it’s the calories in a cup of ice cream or the microplastics in your clothes, life would be easier if we didn’t know. Easier to wantonly consume if we were unaware of the people who struggled daily to put food on the table. Easier to buy one more dust collecting thing for our overflowing homes if we didn’t know about the waste and pollution that was produced in its creation.
These are painful thoughts to sit with. After all, we’re only doing what everyone else is doing, what we’re told we should be doing. And we’re supposed to feel bad about that? Given enough space these thoughts can generate feelings of guilt. So we push those thoughts aside and take the bite, or swipe the card.
But once you know…there’s no forgetting.
The burden of knowing is growing.
“Each generation stands on the shoulders of its predecessors.” But we also inherit their problems and shortcomings as well.
We’re living in an age of rapid transformation. Every day we’re generating new data and developing new technologies, things that are undoubtedly making life better for many.
But there is a counter to all that good. Our faster pace of life is also allowing for a greater accumulation of negatives as well. More benefits, certainly, but also more unsolved issues and the creation of problems that have yet to rear their ugly heads. We’re accumulating the cost of “business as usual,” watching the pretty problems pile up before our eyes.
The complexity of our creation is growing and there is no owners manual to understand it.
You don’t build higher when there are cracks in the walls and foundation. That would be a recipe for disaster. Yet it’s exactly what we are doing.
Magnification
There are these concepts in nature of bioaccumulation and biomagnification. Certain elements, or toxins, accumulate in the individuals of a species as they go about their lives. Then, when individuals of that species are consumed by another species further up the food chain, the element or toxin gets magnified. It’s in this way that some of the world’s top predators, like killer whales, have to be treated as hazardous waste when they wash up dead on a beach. Their bodies have accumulated such high levels of toxins that have repeatedly magnified up the food chain from the very bottom…where we put them.
What other problems are accumulating and magnifying their way up the food chain of our societies and how do we get this under control?
“Knowing” paints the world in a different light.
Our experiences and knowledge create the world we “see”. It’s an odd thing to grasp, but it’s true, we don’t all see the same world when we look around.
Different tints and hues color or tunnel our vision and some of those alterations don’t necessarily paint the prettiest picture. We all have things we wish we didn’t know. Hard concepts we wish we could forget.
These experiences are what make us unique though. What might be a relaxing, leisurely stroll down the street or through the woods for everyone else, is actually a distressing hike through a degraded wasteland, or walk through a painful memory.
Together, we can form a more complete understanding of the world and the problems we face. We can share the burden of the problems we’ve inherited, but we have to fight the urge to not know.
We won’t be walking around this planet for long if everyone is blissfully unaware.
Ignorance may be bliss, but it’s dangerous too.
I empathize with the authors sentiment. I understand his pent up frustration. The burden of knowing and grasping the overwhelming severity of a situation so near and dear to you is beyond heavy.
But he did the one thing we need more of. He tried! He invested himself in a project to give back, to repair. He did the complete opposite of what he sought in that moment of despair. He learned everything he could about the subject in order to help. And he learned in the process, that there was fundamentally something missing. Something deeper and more elongated than could have been picked out had he not put in the work. He stresses about his children and the time he should have been focusing on them, but he was providing an example of how to live a full and passionate life. An example they will carry with them forever.
He most certainly sees the world in a different light now and that change in perspective is going to catapult him forward to a place he never thought he would have gone before.
It’s all too easy to look back with 20/20 vision and admonish ourselves for the choices we made. It’s far more difficult to move boldly into the future and take action to right the wrongs we see. To know the risks, but to go anyways.
Find something that frustrates you and learn more about it. Learn how you can help, and do it. The world can’t afford anymore ignorance.
“Sentiment without action is the ruin of the soul.” — Ed Abbey
